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The One Where My Husband (Almost) Loses His Plumber’s License

July 19, 2010 in Family, Food, Friends, Home, Marriage by Sara | 4 comments

Our kitchen faucet had been broken for months. At first it was just a little bit broken. By that I mean that the little thingy on the top that tells you which direction to turn for cold and which to turn for hot kept falling off. Not really a problem as I still have all my sensory capacities in my extremities and had memorized “left for cold, right for hot” a while back. Then the pull down sprayer started acting wonky. It would suddenly just stop working and would only begin again after you punched the little black buttons on the side about a million times and said a few cuss words (out of the children’s hearing, of course). Then it wouldn’t turn off unless you shut it off and then pushed down on the middle of the turner offer thing. Then there was the constant explaining to guests on the proper off and push antics required each time you used the crazy thing.

And yet we let this go on for MONTHS.

Mostly because the thought of buying a new faucet did not bring me great joy. I’d frankly rather buy another pair of pajamas.

In the end, I took my friend Betty to Lowes and we picked out a new faucet. (Not before I’m sure she was ready to kill me for agonizing over the decision for so long.)

JD replaced it last weekend. Works beautifully. Simple to turn off and on. Delightful.

But you do remember this, right?

JD and the girls were at his folks for the weekend, leaving me alone in my house for about 4 days. So I threw a little girl’s only party Friday night and we had a wonderful time. We all brought cold or room temperature salads and they were yummy. The last gal left abut 10:45, I quickly cleaned up the kitchen using my new faucet and trusty garbage disposal to get rid of some excess arugula from one of the salads. I headed downstairs where I watched a couple of shows I’d DVR’d and then headed off to bed thinking of the wonderful Saturday I had ahead of me where I could do anything I wanted. A long walk/run with Lucy. A visit to the farmer’s market. Perhaps even a movie in the afternoon. The day was mine……..

Oh, what’s that? The light in the laundry room was on. So I opened the door, stepped inside and

SPLASH!

Right into 4 inches of arugula strewn water.

And so I did what all good southern women have done since Scarlett O’Hara set the example. I decided to think about it tomorrow and after making sure it wasn’t getting any worse, I went to bed.

The morning found most of the water gone but bits and pieces of salad from last night’s dinner stuck firmly to the floor.

I then made a decision which shall haunt me the rest of my days and is sure to give my family ample opportunity for mocking me.

I put a load of sopping wet towels in the washing machine and turned it on.

Wait. It gets better.

I then put Lucy’s leash on her and we went for a nice one hour walk around the neighborhood.

I KNOW!

What in the world?!

It will come as no surprise to you, gentle reader, that I arrived back home to 4 more inches of water in the laundry room. Luckily, while on my walk I ran into my neighbor who gave me the number of the best sewer and drain people in town.

The very nice man on the other end seemed so pleased that I had interrupted his Saturday morning with my pesky drain problems. And so to teach me a lesson he gave me a lecture on garbage disposals. His speech went on for several minutes. I’ll condense it for you. Basically it boils down to this.

Garbage disposals are from the devil. They should never actually be used. If you do feel you just MUST use the devil’s machine, you must feed it carefully only one tablespoon of food at a time. You must then follow this with copious amounts of water, ice cubes and perhaps a cup of bleach.

And then he says, “You know I’ll have to charge you time and a half to come out today and fix it.”

Exactly what was I supposed to say to this? “Oh no thanks, then. I’ll just leave water and rotting food in the basement til Monday.”

If he had attempted to extract a promise of my firstborn, I probably would have agreed.

Two hours later a nice young man named Michael (who appeared to have crawled through many sewers and drains already that morning) made a lot of noise and cleared out the drain.

Turns out it was sludge, food and lint from the dryer causing all the problems. Not a thing to do with JD’s recent plumbing job.

So he shall keep his plumbing license for now. He’s going to need it.

Somebody’s got to get rid of that darn disposal.

Out of Control: Part 2

July 15, 2010 in Family, Home, Kids, Mothering by Sara | 1 comment

The first lesson?

Little boys are not like little girls.

Little boys have lots of energy and it needs to go somewhere. And it needs to go there fast. And furious.

Little boys have some sort of magic power that enables them to produce rocks and sticks and dirt and bits of everything else from what seems like right out of thin air. And they stick all of it in their pockets.

I learned to check those pockets right quick before throwing them in the washing machine.

My bathrooms needed cleaning more often. Little boys do not have good aim. Nor do they always remember to put the seat up.

Or down.

I also learned that our house was a nice place with some of that little boy energy in it. Even if we didn’t always know what to do with it or it sometimes needed to be redirected or harnesses in a little bit.

Yeah. That harnessing bit?

The lessons were about to get harder.

Tender Hearted

June 21, 2010 in Faith, Family, Home, Kids by Sara | 2 comments

As I mentioned before, our church is studying the book of James this summer. It’s been convicting on many, many levels but never so much as today.

Today we were looking at the final verses in Chapter one. Basically, James tells us to put some legs on our faith. To be selfless. To look after the unfortunate. And by doing these things, we will know that our faith is true.

²⁷Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

Ironically enough, this week poses some of the biggest challenges I have had in this area in a long time. Things have transpired that are calling me (in the smallest of ways) to die to myself and my desires. And let me tell you that I am not dying a pretty death. In fact, I think that I am fighting it tooth and nail.

You see, I had an agenda for the week. The details were already worked out in my head. The plans were laid. The timing of things I had to do and when I needed to do them set firmly down.

And then everything changed.

I did not like it one little bit.

These new developments did not fit in with my plans. They will require changes and modifications and yes, even some sacrifice (again, embarrassingly small).

All of which, if I am truly trying to live out my faith in any real way, I should have just accepted as His plan for this week and gone about being joyful.

I will admit that I have failed miserably in that department. I instead have allowed myself to feel frustrated and angry and even a little bit bitter.

Perhaps I have become a bit polluted by the world. Or a bit jaded or calloused by the needs I see around me. I was reminded of this yesterday afternoon.

We were on our way to the movies yesterday when we passed a homeless guy at the entrance to the interstate. There is always someone there and I have, on occasion, given them something. But this day, JD and I were talking about something and while I noticed him, that is all I did.

Several minutes later I heard some sniffling coming from the back seat. I turned around to find big fat tears running down Elena’s face. I initially thought she had read something upsetting in the book she held in her hands. Turns out she was crying about the homeless man. She cried for the entire 20 minutes we were in the car and there was just no consoling her.

Oh that my heart was still as tender. Because we are not commanded to take care of the orphans and widows just when we feel like it or when it is convenient.

The lessons I’ve still to learn?

They are never ending.

Hallelujah

March 11, 2010 in Family, Home by Sara | No comments

The cold weather has broken.

The sky is blue.

The kids have been outside playing since they got home from school.

We fired up the grill for the first time since last fall.

The smell of grilled chicken is wafting through the open door of our screened in porch where we will eat supper tonight.

I am so happy that spring is coming that I promise not to complain about the dirt that is sure to be tracked all over my kitchen when the kids come in.

Totally worth it to hear their happy voices playing with all the neighbor kids.

Welcome spring. We sure have missed you.

Wake Up Maggie, I Think I Got Something To Say To You

February 10, 2010 in Home, Marriage by Sara | 1 comment

This has been a week of technological wonderfulness at our house.

First, I managed to run over my blackberry with my car on Saturday. Likely story, you say? Yeah, so did JD. He is convinced it was an evil plot to bring even more Mac products into our house. It was an accident. I swear. You’ll remember that I managed to lose my last cell phone in our garbage disposal where it met an untimely and gruesome death, so it should surprise no one that I somehow managed to run over this one. Twice.

I looked at it this way. The universe was telling me to finally make the leap to the iPhone.

I’m in love.

However, so is JD. After coveting U-verse for months and months and months, he we decided to get it installed. You should have seen him talking techie talk with Roger, the guy who came to install it. I wish you could have seen them. Roger would look up and say something like, ” Your 87993 bits of…….lalalalala (this is where I would lose track)” and JD would get this very happy look on his face.

I got a happy look on my face because Roger looked EXACTLY like a young Rod Stewart.

I am not kidding. And the funny thing is that he TOTALLY pulled it off. He didn’t look one bit silly in spite of the 3 gallons of hair product he must have had in his hair. I’m telling you that his highlights and the volume he managed to tease out of his hair were nothing short of amazing. If only he had broken into a chorus of “Maggie Mae” I would have been sure I’d died and gone to heaven.

I’m totally regretting not getting a picture of him and his wonderful 1980’s do.

With my iPhone.

Happy New Year

January 1, 2010 in Family, Holidays, Home by Sara | 2 comments

Know what happens when you put sixteen of my relatives in one house on New Years Eve?

Lots of laughing.

Lots of eating.

Lots of cousins loving on each other.

Lots of Guitar Hero.

Lots of eating.

Lots of stories.

Lots of football.

Lots of love.

Mostly, just a whole lot of love.

(with a little bit of loud thrown in…..it is my family after all and we just don’t know how to do things quietly)

Hope you are starting the new year surrounded by those you love.

2009….you’ve been a very good year. Lots of changes. Lots of challenges. Lots of life.

We are blessed.

No One Will Ever Confuse Us With The Griswalds

December 8, 2009 in Holidays, Home, My People by Sara | 7 comments

Since JD and I married we have only spent Christmas in our own house one time. Usually we take time about going to his folks or to mine. The girls have no memory of ever spending Christmas in their own house.

My mom, although I know she feels conflicted about it, has been encouraging us to establish our own traditions. She’s good that way. One of the things I’ve always loved about her is her willingness to let me be independent.

With all the other changes that happened this year, it just kind of seemed like this was the right time to start our own thing. So we are staying home for Christmas.

The problem with this is that I have almost no Christmas decorations. I’ve always just done the bare minimum to escape being a total Scrooge. For the last several years we haven’t even put up a real tree. We just made do with a little 4 ft pitiful thing that held only a few of our ornaments.

Add to this lack of tinsel and bows the fact that we now live on a street that does it UP RIGHT at Christmas and you see my dilemma. For those of you who hail from my hometown, remember Chief’s house? Yeah, we’ve got our own Chief just two houses down. For those of you who don’t have any idea what I’m talking about, just picture every Christmas light you’ve ever seen including, but not limited to, reindeer, a manger scene, candy canes, and Santa and his sleigh on the roof and countless other things all blazing with full color. All on a house that was probably about 1200 square feet (if that). When I was really small I can remember walking up to the porch were Chief would sit dressed as Santa and hand out candy canes to the kids.

So we bought a few things. Some lights and some garland. But by far my favorite find so far are these over sized ornaments I found at Target. Love, love, love them.

This morning we woke to the first snow of the season. It didn’t last long, but it sure made my puny little decorations look wonderful.

Maybe I’ll hit the after Christmas sales and pick up a couple of inflatable Santas and a herd of lighted reindeer for the front yard.

Or maybe not.

I don’t think I have Chief’s artistic flair. Or enough electrical outlets.

The Family That Plays Together…..

November 11, 2009 in Family, Home, Kids by Sara | 1 comment

Okay, so I know that it’s really “the family that prays together….”, but I’d argue that family game night helps, too.

I actually love when the time changes and it gets dark sooner. I completely hate getting up in the dark, but am happy to gather my brood together in the evening and hunker down for the night.

We like to fill the hour or so after supper with games. JD picks most of the games we get. Like everything else he buys, he researches potential games very well. He usually hits it out of the park.

One of our favorites is called Carcassonne. It is a strategy game for up to 5 players.

The reccomended age range is 10 and up but Elena has been playing since she was six and has actually won a couple of times. You can complete a game in about 60-90 minutes including breaks for the bathroom, petting the dog, getting snacks and other such distractions.

You build cities and roads and have farmers and knights. You can be ruthless or helpful and at our house it totally depends on the night as to which wins out.

You want to use these little guys very wisely.

The scoring is the hardest part but really pretty simple once you’ve done it a time or two. And there is a scoring guide included.

Christmas is coming…….I’ll bet you can think of someone who could use a good game to fill up the dark winter evenings.

This is a good one.

My Inheritance

September 29, 2009 in Family, Home by Sara | 5 comments

We had a fabulous weekend with the folks. Even though the weatherman lied, lied, lied and instead of clearing up we had even more rain. The sun broke through for a brief moment Saturday night and then went right back behind the clouds after midnight. I can’t remember a night in the last week that I haven’t been awakened by a rainstorm. It did clear up a little while yesterday which did let us get out of the house for a bit (which pleased my husband).

Of course the sun is shining to beat the band right now. Right after Mom and Dad pulled out of our driveway.

We had fun in spite (and perhaps because of) the rain. It let us do a lot of sitting around and talking without feeling that we should be out DOING something. Although JD and my dad would tell you they did a lot of something because they pulled out some overgrown shrubs and cut down a sizable tree out of the yard. But they also got to watch a good bit of football. Always a good thing when you are from the SEC. (We’ve grandfathered JD in even though he is a Yankee.)

One of the main reasons my folks came up this weekend was to bring me something. I’ve been anticipating this delivery for a long time.

Several years ago, my mom and dad built themselves a new dining room table. They needed more room since the grandkids were coming in droves. It fit nicely in the dining room of their old house, but since they moved to the new place a couple of years ago, it just hasn’t been right. It was too big for the space and even though it was large, our family was larger.

So they brought it to me this weekend.

I love everything about it. I love the color and the simplicity of the design. I love that the top is one long piece and I don’t have to take leaves in and out of it. But mostly I love that every bit of it was done by my mom and dad’s very own hands. Daddy cut the timber, planed it, turned the legs and nailed it all together. My mom sanded every rough patch down, stained and polished it. It is not perfect. And that makes me love it more. We had the first meals around our new table this weekend. I think it even made the food taste better.

I love that it sat in my mom and dad’s house and now it sits in mine. I plan on taking such good care of it that one day it will sit in Katie or Elena’s house and they will gather their children and grandchildren around it. (I guess they’ll have to wrestle to see which one gets it.)

Thanks Mom and Dad. I love you.

Oh, and if anyone ever wonders where I get my embellishment skills they would only have had to listen to my daddy tell a story involving his big toe, a 12-gauge shot gun that slipped out of its holder, a smashed toenail, a pocketknife and an ill timed dove hunt to see that the apple did not fall far from the tree.

Next time you see him, be sure and ask him about it…….

Make New Friends but Keep The Old

September 8, 2009 in Family, Friends, Home by Sara | 1 comment

I wish I had a lot of pictures to show you from our Labor Day Weekend. I’d show you my girls jumping up and down when their very best buddies and our dear neighbors from Virginia pulled onto our street on Friday night. Their reunion was everything we had all hoped it would be with them falling right back into the rhythm of their friendship without so much as a hiccup. We were so happy to talk them and their parents into staying with us until Sunday morning and getting a chance to catch up from our summer travels. We are thrilled that their trips back home to Minnesota at Christmas and in the summer will now include a stop at our house. I’ve promised them pancakes and bacon.

I’d also show you JD’s folks arriving and seeing our new home for the first time. I’d show them meeting their new grandpup, Lucy and I’d show them doing a thousand little things to help us over the weekend. Things that ranged from fixing a leaky toilet to arranging flowers for my table. We love them.

I’d show you our first Labor Day BBQ which kept growing and growing until there were about 40 people in attendance. We no longer worry about our screened in porch collaspsing. If it survivied Sunday night, it can survive anything. I’d show you the yummy ribs and mac and cheese and baked beans we made. The pies and brownies and cakes (oh my Lord, that cake!) that friends made. The yummy side dishes that rounded out the table and I’d show you a picture of a bunch of people that have eaten far too much for their own good. I’d show you new friends and old friends laughing and talking together. I’d show you at least 15 kids playing Wii in the basement and running through the house. I’d show you 5 girls crashed on our daughter’s floor and I’d show you the pancakes we all had for breakfast this morning.

But the truth is that we were so busy having a good time that we didn’t take the time to pull out the camera to record much of it. Maybe we’ll be sorry about that, but the images of the blessings in our lives are ones that will always be in our head and hearts, if not on our hard drive.

We did get a couple of shots. I’ll leave you with them.

But trust me. They don’t begin to tell the whole story of this wonderful weekend.

Olivia, Katie, Elena and Elie: Old friends reunited

The New Gang: Maggie, Katie, Emily, Lily and Elena

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