I’ve been thinking about growing old lately. Or perhaps the thoughts are really more about not growing old.
I’m not as freaked out about that as you might think. And things are going well with my treatment. And we don’t know what God has in store for me. And seriously? We’ve gotten excellent news with each passing treatment and scan.
We’ve all had the same reaction to this good news. “God is so Good!”
Yes He is.
But here is the thing. He’s not good just because I’m getting good news. He would still be good even if the news was bad. He is not good because He makes things come out like we want them to. He’s not good only if I get to see my kids graduate from college and dance at their weddings and hold my grandchildren. He’s not good only if my circumstances change.
He’s good because He is Good. Because of His very nature and character.
Wow. How was that for a soapbox? I remember listening to some of Matt Chandler’s sermons after he was diagnosed with his brain tumor. I told my friend Jim that I thought he sounded a bit cranky.
He’s not cranky. He’s just had the veil we all look through lifted just a bit. As have I. And when you have that happen, the truth just becomes so darn clear. I can’t speak for him, of course, but there is a feeling in me now that I just MUST speak what I know as truth. We aren’t cranky. We just have a new sense of urgency about things.
He is good. Whatever the future holds for me. Want to know one of my biggest fears? That people would see my early death (if that’s what happens) as some sort of failure on God’s part. That if things don’t turn out like we think they should, that they will will turn their backs on Him. That they might think He isn’t what He claims to be just because things didn’t go my way.
Let me just say this again. Whatever happens to me, things have gone my way. I’m in a no lose situation. I’m fighting like a wildcat to stick around but if I don’t?
He is still good. Because He is. He just is.